Lord, I Want to be Like Jesus in My Heart

There is a woman acquaintance of mine that can really get under my skin.  She tells people about me in front of me; you know, she acts like she knows me intimately while ignoring that I am standing beside her.  Ew!

She is loud, rude, interrupts and finishes my sentences when I am talking to others.  She tries to inject herself into my life; wants to be my friend.  She has no friends because others in our small town find her as irritating as I do.  It is difficult for her to take a  hint and I have found myself being openly impatient and rude to her.  Bad Christian, bad ! !

Excuse:  I do not make friends easily.  Many years ago, a "friend" turned on me in a way that changed the course of my life and I have been very cautious about friends ever since.  It took me many years to even accept a friend after that.  I take friendship very seriously and can count close friends from my entire life on one hand.  I choose my friends (carefully) - not the other way around.

Lord, I want to be like Jesus in my heart.

I found myself being rude to her one day (not that she even noticed) and that night prayed about the situation, because I was ashamed.  Next morning, I took my coffee in front of one of my favorite TV evangelists just to hear him talking about being nice to people who are irritating.  Oooops!  Next morning, with coffee in front of another minister, I heard a similar message about patience with people who are difficult and do not have friends. 

Yes, He speaks to us in various ways, when we are listening.  (I wish I had not been listening.)  You know that creepy feeling that convicts you of poor behavior when you are beginning to get smug about yourself ?  It's called conviction. 

Realize: God will not let me move on with my spiritual growth until I deal with this issue.  What to do?

First, realize she is a sheep without a shepherd.  She is a sister in Christ.  (We should never be openly impatient with a fellow Christian.)  She is her own worst enemy.  She needs a friend.  Granted, we will never be close but I can be more patient with her. 

I am vowing to have better conversations with her than just "no", "okay" and "that's nice".  I will give her more of my time, rather than making excuses to run away.  I should be flattered rather than irritated. 

Then, I will pray for her . . . . and me.  There is magic in praying for any one you have a problem with.  It's a trick of God: When you pray for anyone, you find yourself defending them, asking help for them and generally becoming their advocate.  This, in turn, makes you more sensitive and understanding to their situation which softens your feelings and creates more Godly attitude in you (me).  Praying for anyone you have an issue with can really improve your own situation.

This lady does not persecute me; actually quite the opposite.  So, I should thank God that anyone admires me enough to want to be a friend.  (It would just be easier if she would take "no" for an answer. - just kidding!  LOL)

Praise God who loves me enough to correct me gently.
Amen

P.S.  It is now a couple months after I first posted this blog.  I want to let you know that I have made the effort to look at her face when I talk to her.  I even initiate conversation.  She does not "strain" any more to get my attention or go out of her way to push in and interrupt.  Things are much more relaxed between us.  She is not imposing herself on me.  We have casual conversation and move on.  That is all this woman wanted; a little recognition - the same recognition that I give anyone else.  It was not easy to write this article.   I wanted to share just in case this personal experience will help someone else smooth over a similar situation.  She did not want to inject herself into my life, merely into the same courtesy I show everyone else; to be counted worthy of the attention from someone she apparently respects.  There is now no strain when I run into her AND I like myself much more.  The blessing here is coming to see some of her positive traits.
Thank you, Father, for teaching me this special lesson.
Amen

Grace Over Law

The child grew and was weaned. Abraham made a great feast on the day Isaac was weaned.  Gen 21:8

 In the verse above we see Isaac weaned off of milk so he could consume solid food.  Hebrew children were weaned at three to five years of age and their religious training began at that time.   In a spiritual way, babes in Christ grow to taking solid food; the word of God.  We grow from taking God's word in literal form to reading with understanding as we grow.  We learned the 10 Commandments as children.  As we mature and grow in the understanding of Jesus, His sacrifice and the grace we have through Him, we are said to be eating the "bread of life" - Jesus.  We realize we no longer need the milk (God's perfect law) because we cannot grow healthy on just milk.  We now have bread (the grace of Jesus).  Through understanding grace over law, we can mature in Jesus.  We, as Christians, can grow in understanding and reflect the light of Jesus in this world.

Just a few years ago, I did not understand the bread of Communion for healing.  I saw speaking in tongues done in the wrong way and did not accept it.  There was a time that I did not believe in anointing for healing.  I thought the 10 Commandments were our absolute law for living; that we could loose our salvation if we did not keep them.  I was self righteous; I was judgemental..  I did not have joy.  I thought the rapture was folklore.  I recently realized that I did not grasp the concept of the trinity.  Over the past couple, or three, years I have been shown the grace of God and my understanding of all these things has come to light through scripture.  I can now read with greater understanding.  I was the babe on milk until I was taught the grace of God and found the bread of life; Jesus.

And you shall love the Lord your God out of with your whole heart, and with all your soul and out of with your mind - with your faculty of thought and your moral understanding - and out, of with, all your strength.  Mk 12:30 & 31
My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.  II Cor 12:9